Funny Jokes for Church Bulletin[194 words]

Dream Valentine
One morning Emma woke up with a start. Her husband Jim asked what was the matter, she told him, “I just had a dream that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine’s day. What do you think it means?”
“You’ll know tonight,” Jim said.
That evening, Jim home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, Emma opened it – only to find a book entitled “The meaning of dreams”.

Vroom Vroom, Valentine
Jim asked his friend, Tony, whether he had bought his wife anything for Valentine’s Day.
“Yes,” came the answer from Tony who was a bit of a chauvinist, “I’ve bought her a belt and a bag.”
“That was very kind of you,” Jim responded. “I hope she appreciated the thought.”
Tony smiled as he replied, “So do I, and hopefully the vacuum cleaner will work better now.”

Valentine’s Day Riddles
Q: What did the ram say to his wife on Valentine’s Day?
A: I only have eyes for ewe, dear!
Q: What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
A: Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?

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