Dear Members and Friends of the Church,
I secretly visited your Bible classes recently and was overjoyed to see that so many of you had not come. I heard some lessons that were not very well prepared and others teachers said no visits had been made during the week. I was simply delighted! It thrilled me to see some leave the worship service right after the Lord’s Supper was over, indicating that they were not going to let the proclamation of God’s Word come near to them. I saw some others come just in time for the worship to sit glassy-eyed with their mouths shut while a few sang the hymns. Then they dozed or acted bored to death while the preacher went through his Sunday morning ritual and hum-drum or “bore-a-story.” I was especially pleased to note how many failed to bring an offering. I love to see the church in financial difficulty.
Again, there was a sparkle in my eyes when I returned Sunday night and saw that so many did not come back for the evening worship hour. I was so very glad. I am writing this letter to encourage you to forsake the worship this coming Sunday. It will be more comfortable for you, and besides, it will make my work much easier to do.
Hoping to be with you real soon!
Deceitfully yours,
THE DEVIL
Bottomless Pit
Brimstone Ave.
Eternity
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