[396 words]
A little boy and his daddy were looking at a litter of puppies, planning to buy one, and the daddy asked the boy which one he wanted. The lad pointed to a pup whose tail was wagging furiously and said, “That one with the happy ending!”
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How Adam Had It Easy
1. He is the only man who has never been compared to the man she could have married.
2. He had no in-laws to drop in.
3. There were no “Jones” for him to keep up with.
4. There were no credit cards or shopping centers.
5. He never had his dinner interrupted by telemarketers.
6. He got away with wearing a simple wardrobe.
7. He never had to shovel snow!
8. If he had gone bald, who would have known that wasn’t normal?
9. There was no “standard weight and height” tables and the word “fat” meant “good!”
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The family sat down to dinner with the preacher. The little six-year-old, after the prayer, spoke up and said, “Would you please pass the buzzard?”
Embarrassed, his mother said, “Johnny, what do you mean? You know we don’t eat buzzard in this house!”
Johnny replied, “Well, earlier, you and Daddy said, ‘We’re having that old buzzard for dinner tonight.”
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Before condemning your preacher’s sermon because it is not original, think about how much worse it might be if it was.
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A fellow in line at the airport walked up to the clerk and said, “I want my brown suitcase to go to Dallas, the black suitcase to go to New York, and the blue one to go to Los Angeles.”
The clerk replied, “I’m sorry sir, we can’t do that!”
The man responded, “Why not? That’s what you did the last time I flew this airline!”
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In the restaurant, the elderly gentleman had, just been served his food, and he bowed to offer silent thanks. To the young men at the adjoining table, this was a very funny thing, and one of them just had to show off for his friends. When the old man lifted his head, one of the young men called to him:
“Hey pops, do they all do that where you come from?”
The old man answered, “No son, the pigs don’t.”
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Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.